When you’re head over heels in love and planning the wedding of your dreams, the last thing you want to think about is a potential divorce. But here’s the thing: love doesn’t pay the legal bills if things go sideways.
Figuring out when you need a prenup isn’t always obvious — it’s a common question, even among couples who never thought they’d utter the word “prenup.”
Let me explain why this question deserves more than just a casual shrug. Whether you’re a twenty-something with student debt and big dreams, or someone who’s been around the block with property and investments, a prenuptial agreement can be more than just a legal safety net.
It can actually set the tone for open communication, trust, and realistic expectations in your marriage. And honestly? That doesn’t sound so bad.
In Canada, what’s commonly called a “prenup” in the U.S. is usually referred to as a “marriage contract” or, in some provinces, a “prenup agreement.” For couples who aren’t married but live together, the equivalent is often called a “cohabitation agreement.” These agreements are governed by provincial or territorial family laws, and they can address not just property division, but also spousal support, debt responsibility, and other financial matters in the event the relationship ends.
So, let’s untangle the myths, realities, pros, and cons of signing a prenup—without sucking the romance out of everything.
“Why Would I Need a Prenup? I’m Not Rich!”
Ah, the classic response. A lot of people think prenups are only for celebrities or millionaires with sprawling mansions and private jets. But you know what? Prenups aren’t just about protecting yachts and trust funds.
They’re about protecting both of you—from messy disputes, from assumptions, and from long, drawn-out court battles if things ever fall apart.
Even if you don’t have much now, you might later. Maybe you’ll build a business together or inherit property down the line. Without a prenup, those future assets could end up being split in ways neither of you intended.
Think of a prenup as a map through an emotional fog. You hope you never need it — but if you do, you’ll be grateful you’ve got directions.
And let’s not ignore debts. If your fiancé has tens of thousands in credit card or gambling debt, guess who could end up entangled in that if you split? Exactly.
The Perks: Why Prenups Can Actually Strengthen Your Relationship
Here’s the unexpected truth: talking about a prenup can improve your relationship before you even tie the knot. It forces you to have candid conversations about money, goals, and priorities. It’s like premarital counseling, but with lawyers.
Here are a few standout benefits to consider:
- Clarity on financial rights and responsibilities. You both know what’s yours, what’s shared, and what happens if the worst occurs.
- Protects family heirlooms or future inheritances. Grandma’s beach house stays in the family.
- Minimizes conflict if divorce happens. Instead of bickering over furniture or stocks, you already know who gets what.
- Safeguards one partner from the other’s debt. (No one wants to inherit someone else’s bad spending habits.)
Think of it like installing smoke detectors. You don’t plan on a fire, but you sure sleep better knowing you’re covered.
The Downsides: Why Some People Skip the Prenup
Now, no one’s saying prenups are perfect. They’re not. Sometimes they introduce tension where there was none. Some people feel like a prenup suggests you’re planning for failure—kind of like bringing an umbrella when the forecast says sunny skies.
Here are some reasons people skip it:
- It can feel unromantic. Nothing kills the honeymoon vibe like hashing out who gets the dog in a hypothetical divorce.
- Legal costs and awkward conversations. Drafting and negotiating a prenup can cost thousands, depending on complexity.
- May not hold up in court. If it’s poorly written, one-sided, or signed under pressure, it could be thrown out.
- People change. Your lives and circumstances can evolve in ways a prenup can’t predict, leaving you feeling boxed in.
So, it’s not all sunshine and legal clarity. Some couples truly don’t need one, especially if their finances are simple and neither has significant assets or debts.
Wait — Does Everyone Really Need a Prenup?
Here’s where we circle back to that big question: do you need a prenup? Well, it depends.
Ask yourself these questions:
- Do you or your partner own significant assets or property?
- Are either of you expecting a large inheritance?
- Is one of you bringing substantial debt into the marriage?
- Will one partner be supporting the other through school or a career change?
- Do you both own businesses or plan to start one?
If you answered “yes” to one or more of these, a prenup might be a smart move. Even if your answers were “not yet,” you might still consider it if you’re concerned about protecting what you build together — or apart.
On the other hand, if you’re young, just starting out, and neither of you has much in the way of assets or liabilities, a prenup might feel unnecessary. That’s okay, too. Sometimes simplicity is its own kind of peace of mind.
So… How Do You Even Bring It up Without Starting a Fight?
Ah, the million-dollar question (sometimes literally). You’re sitting at dinner, the candles are flickering, and suddenly you blurt out, “Hey, should we get a prenup?” Not exactly date-night material.
Here’s a smoother way to approach it:
- Frame it as a conversation about shared goals and financial planning, not mistrust.
- Emphasize that it protects both of you.
- Bring up real-life examples (not necessarily your parents’ messy divorce, but perhaps a celebrity case in the news).
- Suggest involving neutral professionals — like financial planners or therapists — alongside family lawyers to keep things balanced.
And remember: timing matters. Don’t wait until the week before the wedding. Start the discussion months in advance when everyone’s calm and clear-headed.
But What if It Feels… Cold?
That’s natural. You’re not alone in feeling a little queasy about the idea. Love and money have a funny way of clashing. But think of a prenup less like a bet against your marriage and more like an insurance policy you hope never to cash in.
After all, no one says you love your car less because you bought auto insurance, right? Same idea.
What Happens if You Skip It?
If you skip the prenup (or “marriage agreement” in BC terms), you’re essentially agreeing to let British Columbia’s Family Law Act decide how your property and debts are divided if you separate. These are the “default” rules of separation and divorce.
Sometimes those rules line up with what you and your spouse would have wanted. Other times, they’re nowhere close.
In BC, the general rule is that all family property (things like the home, bank accounts, investments, and even certain pensions acquired during the relationship) is divided 50/50, regardless of who paid for it or whose name is on the title. Family debt is also shared equally. Property you owned before the relationship is usually excluded, but any increase in its value during the relationship can be divided.
You can see how relying solely on the default rules could lead to outcomes you never intended—and possibly some surprises you’d rather avoid.
The Emotional Side: How to Stay Connected While Planning for the Worst
Here’s the part most people forget: this isn’t just a legal document. It’s an emotional one, too. The process can feel vulnerable, even scary. But if you approach it with honesty and empathy, it can actually strengthen your bond.
Some couples even say that discussing a prenup taught them how to fight fair — calmly, constructively, and with respect. In a weird way, it’s like a practice run for handling the tough conversations you’ll inevitably face in marriage.
It’s okay to feel conflicted. It’s okay to cry, laugh, or even disagree about what’s “fair.” What matters is that you’re willing to work through it together.
The Bottom Line: What’s Right for You?
Here’s the honest answer: not everyone needs a prenup, but everyone should at least consider one. The key is to talk about it early, openly, and thoughtfully.
If you have complex finances, own a business, expect a large inheritance, or just want to be sure you’re both protected, a prenup can save you a lot of heartache (and money) later.
If your finances are straightforward and you both trust the default laws of your province, maybe you can skip it — with a clear conscience.
Either way, the conversation itself is worth having. It might just reveal things about each other you hadn’t even thought to ask.
Wrapping It Up: Protect Your Heart — and Your Assets
Only you and your partner can decide whether you need a prenup. But now you’re equipped to have that conversation without fear or confusion.
And if you decide you do need one? Well, don’t navigate it alone. Let our family law agreement lawyers at Maio Law guide you through the process with compassion, clarity, and a touch of humor when you need it most.
Because protecting your future shouldn’t come at the cost of your peace of mind — or your love story.
